Curiously, there's no "port" and no "vale" anywhere near Port Vale. Apparently it's not even a place at all. Despite all this, guest blogger Andy Brown managed to locate Orient somewhere in deepest, darkest Staffordshire. Probably wishes he hadn't bothered, mind. Here's his take on the game...
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Orient's rearguard action? Not so much |
A game in which… The form book suggested that Orient would continue their bizarre record of winning away in grim northern towns following their surprising victory over Doncaster in the week. Only it didn’t pan out like that, as a ten-man Orient – far from putting in a dogged Rorke’s Drift rear-guard action – folded like a cheap tent to give Vale the easiest game they’ll play all season.
Jump off your seat moment… Darius Henderson, who always goes up for headers flapping his arms about like a pig trying to fly, managed to earn himself a red card. None of us wanted to be there in the cold and rain either, but you didn’t see us getting ejected just to ride shotgun out of Stoke-on-Trent.
Give that man a medal… A tough call as nobody covered themselves in glory, but Gary Woods made a good save at 0-0 and Shane Lowry and Scott Cuthbert did their best in an otherwise poor defence. Dean Cox gave Orient a real lift when he came on, but the injury list is now so long that for Tuesday's game against Preston we may see Kevin Dearden on the (reinforced) bench.
Taxi for… Plenty of shocking performances today, but the midfield in particular was non-existent, with no Vincelot or long term absentee Lloyd James. The “Marvin Bartley masquerading as a footballer” joke is wearing very thin, and the “Jobi McAnuff can’t be arsed for his five-figure-a-week salary” joke is even less amusing. To paraphrase the great Franz Beckenbauer: “Woods apart, you could take all of them, put them in a bag and hit them with a stick. Whoever got hit would deserve it”
“Fuck the technical shit”… In his post-match interview, Orient’s interim manager Kevin Nugent showed more evasiveness than an eel covered in oil. Apparently Orient didn’t start well, didn’t make tackles and would hope to have done better with ten men. No surprise then that the next day he was demoted from "acting-interim-caretaker-head-coach" to simply "coach", with ex-sporting director Mauro Milanese now in the driving seat.
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Burslem by day |
Meanwhile in a place not called Port Vale… Burslem may well look like a setting for The Walking Dead, which probably explains why Orient always do badly at Port Vale when it’s daylight, and they can see where they are. But it surprised me to learn from a friend and Staffordshire native that the Red Lion pub is in fact on the Robbie Williams heritage trail tour. No wonder he hit the drugs hard! It looks more to me like a guaranteed chance of getting stabbed, so someone is having a laugh!
Burslem isn't brilliant, but it's still better than Stoke. Thanks for the three points.
ReplyDeleteEVERY blogger who sees their team lose against Vale has a pop at Burslem afterwards. Cheer up, pal.
ReplyDeleteFor information.
ReplyDeleteThe name Port Vale comes from Port Vale House which used to be situated about a mile from Burslem near to the Trent and Mersey Canal. This is where a group of lads formed a football club in the late 1800's. The" Port" referred to a loading place for pottery and other goods that were loaded on to barges for transport to Liverpool etc. to be sent overseas. Clay from Cornwall was also imported here after having been taken around the coast by ship from Cornwall to Liverpool and then by barge along the canal. No M5 or M6 in those days! There is still a street down there called Port Vale Street to this day. If you play us again next season explore some of the pubs in Burslem its the deadest town on the planet but has some great ale houses. If you go into the Leopard this is where Josiah Wedgwood met James Brindley to discuss the building of our canal system in 1765. There are some great paintings in there. The Leopard is said to be haunted by "Molly Leigh" the Burslem witch so watch your back if you dare to enter the premises. Here ends the history lesson.
Thanks for the 3 points at least you are admitting that your player was fairly dismissed though which makes a change. At least we don't have to suffer John Hartson calling us cheats like a certain team that play in red and white just down the road!
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