29 August 2015

Leyton Orient 2 Bristol Rovers 0, 29/8/15

A game in which... Orient couldn't have been more workmanlike if they'd played the entire 90 minutes drinking Tetley tea, bearing their bum cracks and shouting sexist insults at women. Remember this was a Bristol Rovers side that haven't lost away from home for a year and the Os needed to be at their most patient and efficient – and were excellent in controlling large parts of the game. Add the touch of class that comes in the human form of Jay Simpson and you're looking at a team who probably won't ever lose again. (Send your complaints to me marked "Jonah" after Luton stuff us 8-0 on Tuesday.)

Shane Lowry
Jump off your seat moment... Three of them actually, all courtesy of the aforementioned Jay Simpson. The goal, of course – by way of some crazy-paving footwork – and then two sliding, last-ditch tackles down the other end of the pitch that demonstrated his utter commitment to the cause. What a joy it is to see such a talented player giving it his all in League Two rather than sulking like a spoilt three-year-old girl upset that not enough people have praised her pigtails in the last four minutes. Or Shane Lowry, same difference.

Give that man a medal... Jay Simpson again, obviously, but let's focus for a moment on the excellence of Sammy Moore. Fans rightly worried that without Romain Vincelot not only would Orient be short of quality beards, but that we'd be playing in the Ryman Isthmian League Division One South by 2019/20. (You do the math.) Not so! AFC Wimbledon fans used to sing "He's here, he's there, he's everywhere" to Moore, and not just because he used to surreptitiously follow people home after matches. His industrious performances should be equally valuable to Orient this season.

Taxi for... Referee Darren Drysdale. If the RAF sergeant took the same approach to his day job as he does to officiating football matches then I suspect he would discharge half his squadron for unregulation eyebrows while the other half would be given medals of honour for mistakenly dropping bombs on their own airbase. What I am saying here is that he was woefully inconsistent. Still, at least he didn't try to launch his own clothing range called Superdrysdale. Oh hang on...

In the dug out... Ian Hendon actually utilised three different formations at different times in this game, much like Fabio Liverani, although probably not because he'd forgotten how many players make up a football team. What is becoming evident is that the manager is a Top Man in more ways than just his choice of suits. He actually seems to know what he's doing.

Meanwhile on Twitter... Our esteemed president's match day behaviour is becoming increasingly bizarre, from his walk on before the season opener to high-fiving fans from his blacked out limousine after the Dagenham game. Today, according to reporter John Walker, Sr Becchetti was jumping up and down in the tunnel after the match with the joyous abandon of someone who'd just evaded capture by the Albanian police force. What next: running round the touchline naked? Apologising for single-handedly relegating us? The mind boggles...

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