Leyton Orient 1 Sheffield United 1, 25/4/15

A game which... left Orient clinging on to League One survival like Sylvester Stallone on a mountain ledge in Cliffhanger. Except Orient aren't Sylvester Stallone are they? Not even Sylvester Stallone in Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot. What I am saying here is that this was another performance lacking in the muscle, passion and heroism you'd expect given the situation.

Sigh. I'll always love those players who got us to Wembley last season but something is deeply wrong if they can't properly raise themselves for a game like this. Orient had Alex Cisak to thank – again – for not being 2-0 down at half-time, and while Mathieu Baudry's bullet header gave some hope, Sheffield United's equaliser was all too inevitable. Still, I'll be at Swindon hoping that some sort of footballing and mathematical miracle will allow us to Escape to Victory...

Jump off your seat moment... I don't think Barry Hearn technically jumped off his seat, but he certainly stood up at half-time and – alone in the gallery – surveyed the carnage of a season that lay before him. One can only imagine what was going through his head, but I'm going to take a wild stab at "Yeah, on reflection, I probably shouldn't have said that thing about West Ham being petrified of the new owner."

Give that man a medal... I'm guessing that the Supporters' Club's end-of-season Star Man dinner is going to be an awkward affair. Or at least it would be if they didn't have the option of giving every single award to Alex Cisak who, since coming on loan from Burnley, has pretty much single-handedly given Orient a sliver of a chance of avoiding relegation. The goalkeeper was superb again today.

Taxi for... Actually no one played totally abysmally today so let's instead turn to our illustrious CEO Alessandro Angelieri who, at this week's Fan's Forum, gave his insight into why Orient are facing imminent relegation. Apparently it's all down to the fact that the players bought in the summer haven't performed as expected. So simple! Next week: Angelieri explains the sinking of the Titanic. "I think a couple of the passengers brought on quite heavy suitcases."

Fabio Liverani

"Fuck the technical shit..." Does anyone still think that Fabio Liverani has even the slightest idea what he's doing? I'm guessing not. But let's not blame him personally. Put it this way: if the owner of a Formula One team selected a 12-year-old schoolgirl to be his lead driver simply on the basis that she once negotiated a fairground dodgems ride without crashing too much, who would you point the finger at when she totalled the car within seven seconds? (For a less metaphorical explanation of why the blame goes right to the top at Orient read here.)

Meanwhile on Twitter... This tragi-comic observation from Os fan Craig Rodhouse: "Only at Orient. A fan throws his season ticket at the bench on the last home game of the season. We know how to protest." Indeed we do. Next week: hundreds of Orient fans refuse to attend another game until early August after the club is relegated to League Two. See you there!

Leyton Orient 1 Sheffield United 1, 31/11/13

A game in which... David Mooney Mk II reverted back to David Mooney Mk I (2011/12 model) and spooned two big chances to put Orient 2-0 up in the first half. Still, the top scorer in League One is allowed the occasional blip - after all, you don't write off the whole Beatles back catalogue just because Paul McCartney subsequently made a song with frogs. 

In fact Orient were pretty impressive in the first half, though lost fluidity in the second and needed Dean Cox to dig them out of a hole. Luckily the toddler-sized winger had brought his toy bucket and spade and helped the home side rescue a point with a late wonder strike. 

Moment of magic... Yes, Cox's goal was pretty special, but it was eclipsed by Elliot Omozusi's scorpion kick in the first half. The defender was forced into emulating Colombian goalkeeper Rene Higuita's infamous save after slipping as a ball dropped towards him - though in his case it was less scorpion, more fatally-wounded bluebottle. 

Moment of madness... The defending that led to Sheffield United's goal, where Elliot Omozusi and Scott Cuthbert appeared to hold a month-long judicial enquiry between themselves as to what should be done with a loose ball in the penalty area, thus allowing Sheffield United to take control of proceedings and stick the ball in the net. 

Shaun Batt on the rampage

Top gun... What a joy it is to see Shaun Batt on the rampage, and two consecutive 50-yard charges in the first half left each and every Sheffield United defender looking like a terror-stricken matador who's accidentally brought a feather duster into the bullring instead of a sword. The striker faded after the break, but once again showed what a huge asset he is to Orient this season. 

In the dug out... Unusually Russell Slade did not celebrate Orient's goal by dad-dancing up the touchline, throwing his cap in the air and signalling up to Barry Hearn that he wants a pay rise. Today he chose to unleash a torrent of abuse at a fan behind the away dugout who'd apparently been giving him some gip. It was reminiscent of the time Martin Ling let fly in similar circumstances back in 2009. "The guy behind me had been harping on all season that he could do a better job than me," recalled the one-time Orient manager. "Funny thing was, it turned out it was Dean Smith."

View from the opposition... "Wouldn't have said this last year, but that's a good point away at Orient," said Blades fan Calum Higgingbottom, echoing the post-match sentiments of many of his fellow supporters. Did you hear that? Sheffield United are celebrating getting a point against Orient. In next week's news Usain Bolt holds a victory parade after recording a dead heat in a 100m race against a pot of yoghurt.

Tweet of the week... What does any self-respecting Orient footballer do of a Saturday evening? Whack on some hair gel, a dash of Intimately Beckham aftershave and head straight for Faces, Gants Hill, if they know what's good for them. Not Mathieu Baudry though, who tweeted: "Girls out... house for myself, sofa, chocolates #soundjob" Sofa?? Chocolates?? Don't tell me you were watching Bridget Jones's Diary on DVD, drinking Echo Falls and painting your toenails too Mathieu? Where's Jimmy Smith when you need him? 

Leyton Orient 0 Sheffield United 1, 6/10/12

A game which... was such a spectacle that were it played in the Olympic Stadium then the literally dozens of new London Orient fans would be demanding their money back, despite the fact they had free tickets. But let's not get too despondent since for most of the 90 minutes the Os matched a team who are better resourced, better supported and, well, just better.

Remember, Orient did actually create a couple of chances and conceded only to a wonder strike. But it's fair to say that despite a recent run of good results, we're not quite the finished article. More a half-decent first paragraph that quickly descends into the sort of meaningless drivel you find on Jimmy Smith's Twitter feed. #LEGOOOO

Moment of magic... The neat interplay between Kevin Lisbie and Lee Cook that cued up Anthony Griffith to score from the edge of the area in the second half. Anthony Griffith didn't score, mind you, he skewed the shot towards the corner flag so apologetically it was like he was grovelling for forgiveness for daring to suggest that Blades' fan Sean Bean was "a bit shit" in The Lord of the Rings.

Moment of madness... Substitute David Mooney's decision to direct a few choice words at Kevin Dearden after it was decreed that Ryan Brunt, rather than Moons himself, was to replace Kevin Lisbie. It's great that the non-scoring Irishman showed some passion, but complaining to Orient's goalkeeping coach is a bit like harassing your local paper boy about the fact that the mainstream media isn't giving enough attention to climate change. It might be true, but there ain't much he can do about it.

Knight in shining armour... Kevin Lisbie, who gets so little service during games that for training he might as well just sit in restaurants being ignored by incompetent waitresses. Nonetheless when he is thrown a scrap he makes things happen, and God only knows where our attacking threat is going to come from if he's out injured for a while.

Pantomime horse... Michael Symes, who's so slow off the mark it appeared he was still chasing a knock down from the Stevenage game back in August. A somewhat baffling decision by Slade to bring on the man voted as the worst striker in the entire history of Rochdale FC instead of top scorer (two goals) Ryan Brunt, but since the laws of the game prevent him from rolling an enormous lump of Playdoh into the penalty area on a broken rollerskate he presumably regards Symes as the next best thing.

In the dug out... Today's starting formation of choice appeared to be a 4-3-2-1 that perfectly nullified the ability of Dean Cox and Lee Cook to create anything from the wings. Still, fair play to Russell he changed it round on 25 minutes to the 4-4-2 system that he and Kevin Nugent stole from the archives of the National Football Museum in the most dangerous Orient endeavour since Steve Castle tried to escape from Pizza Hut without paying for his deep pan Hawaiian.

Meanwhile on Twitter.... "I wonder what Jimmy Smith gets up to when he's not trimming his hair or training?" said no one ever. But nonetheless, thanks to the magic of Twitter, the Orient midfielder gave us a unique insight into how he passes the time. And apparently he passes the time by arranging air fresheners into tower-like structures in his kitchen. "#Home Chilling + Treated The Crib LoL #SmellsGooooood" he tweeted alongside this photo. Scott Cuthbert, however, was having none of it, replying, "the crib? Ure not an american rapper lad!" Quite.

Statto corner... When Leyton Orient decided to change their name to just Orient in 1966 they took to the pitch for their first home of the season against Scunthorpe with just eight players, as three new signings had got on the wrong bus at Stratford. "There was no clue in the name," said confused centre-half John "Snedders" Sneddon.