Cambridge United 1 Leyton Orient 1, 12/9/15

"I think they're giant cats, Maureen" 

A game in which... Leyton Orient's urban-dwelling fans were utterly bemused by the sight of a herd of cows outside of Cambridge's Abbey Stadium. Were they giants cats? Radioactive guinea pigs? And why was a bloke who looked suspiciously like David Mooney trying and failing to hit them on the arse with a banjo?

While this confusion reigned, a football match broke out – to some extent anyway. Orient dominated for certain periods and probably should've scored more, but without the benched Dean Cox the quality of the final ball was noticeably lacking. A point away from home is never a disaster, but it's fair to say this wasn't a game that'll live long in the... what was I saying again?

Jump off your seat moment... The exquisite, floated pass from Mathieu Baudry – performed totally blindfolded – that put Jay Simpson through to score Orient's equaliser. Worth mentioning too how well the Frenchman and Connor Essam are complementing each other in central defence: Baudry the footballing equivalent of an evening of foie gras, Châteauneuf-du-Pape and a discourse on the merits of Descartes; Essam more 14 pints of Fosters, a curry and a visit to A&E.

Give that man a medal... Bradley Pritchard is apparently going to play every single second of every single Orient match until the end of time. But at the moment that is no bad thing for the midfielder is proving the value of having someone run around a lot and play very short passes to nearby team mates. Once again the former Charlton man was instrumental in much of the Os' more forthright football.

Frazer Shaw 

Taxi for... So far he's been excellent but today wasn't the best day for Frazer Shaw. Once past the halfway line, the left back's powers seemed to drain from him, like Superman faced with Kryptonite; Indiana Jones in a pit of snakes; or Francesco Becchetti in the company of an Albanian law-enforcer. The fine young player that he is, Shaw will come good again though.

In the dug out... With Coxy carrying a knock, Ian Hendon reverted to a formation often favoured by Fabio Liverani: the four central midfielder classic. Where the current manager differed from his predecessor is that a) he didn't also select four central defenders b) he's not insane. And while fans might liked to have seen Blair Turgott given more time on the pitch, the fact we're still sitting on top of the league table suggests Hendon does still have some idea what he's doing.

Meanwhile in the press room... Robbie Simpson cupcakes! I kid you not, and Orient commentator Dave Victor had the photographic evidence to prove it. They reportedly came in two flavours: mediocrity and despair, and fell to pieces as soon as they got anywhere near your mouth. *taps microphone* *winks*

Play-off final: The ten ways Orient can beat Rotherham

So in advance of Orient's biggest game in decades I thought I'd calm nerves by revealing 10 ways our east London heroes can win at Wembley. Worryingly I could only think of five. 

Luckily Os fan and Times journalist James Masters came up with another five, so together we present you the cold hard evidence that Orient will be in the Championship next season. Possibly. 

No need to dress up for the
Wembley cameras, Romain

1. Play the game, not the occasion
Yes it's Wembley, yes it's a big day out and yes, there will be half and half scarves, but it's important the players treat the game like any other. That means no waving to your loved ones on the way out of the tunnel, no stopping on the edge of the area to check out the big screen to see if your hair is in place and no smiling in the tunnel at your opponents. It's just another game. You're there to win - Wembley is not a place for losers.
James Masters

2. Out-sing the Millers
If you're one of the 19,000 new fans Orient seem to have acquired in the space of the week, you've got some catching up to do to learn all of our terrace chants. To be fair, that catching up will take you about seven seconds given we only have about three songs, but you'll need to sing them loudly and proudly to drown out the famously catchy Rotherham ditty "It's right grim oop north, but if thi'ivver does owt for nowt, allus do it for thissen".
Matt Simpson 

"We've got THIS much money!"

3. Don't mention the money
Steve Evans, who is rumoured to sleep in Egyptian cotton sheets, much to the dismay of the local UKIP councillors, hates nothing more than hearing how Rotherham have bought their success. The Millers have only paid for one player in their squad - one more than Orient, mind you. Forget the fact that chairman Tony Stewart has pumped in £30 million in the past five years and built a brand new stadium. Compare that to Orient who can't even get the Wi-Fi to work in the press box after running out of 10p pieces.
James Masters

4. Take out Revell 
Though there is no statistical evidence for it whatsoever, it is 100 per cent fact that all footballers score a goal whenever they play against a former club. Behold Rotherham's Alex Revell, then: he of chiselled jaw, ice-white teeth and one profitable season at Brisbane Road. The big striker has been strength training by trying to roll Steve Evans up a slight incline and will be a menace to Nathan Clarke and Mathieu Baudry throughout the final. Our defensive duo will need to be at their eye-bulging best.
Matt Simpson 

5. Don't concede early
You can't win the game in the first 10 minutes but you can certainly lose it. Don't start like Arsenal did last week at Wembley - still in the changing room with the headphones on whiling away time to what today's kids call "hip hop". Yes, Arsenal fought back but Orient probably aren't going to be able to bring Rosicky and Wilshere off the bench. Take a breath, stay calm and do what you've done all season. It's just another game.
James Masters 

Shaun Batt: unpredictable 

6. Unleash the Battman
When Russelll Slade brings Shaun Batt off the bench with 20 minutes to go - you can set your watch by it if you like - the Rotherham defence will know they're in for a rough time. The striker is delightfully unpredictable: sometimes, for example, he'll knock the ball 30 yards ahead of himself and then charge after it and sometimes he'll knock the ball 35 yards ahead of himself and charge after it. Two of Orient's three play-off semi-final goals were set up by the Battman, and he's sure to have a say in the final one way or the other.
Matt Simpson

7. Back our big man
Big games call for big game players and you won't find many men bigger than Kevin Dearden or Steve Evans. Dearden has grown into his role as a figure of fun, serenading fans with chants regarding his rather rotund waistline. Evans, whose list of misdemeanours is as long as his daily order a the local kebab shop, is far more prone to explode and lead to allegations of him pulling down his trousers. Wembley are apparently so concerned about the two men meeting that they've been given separate departure times to walk out the tunnel.
James Masters 

This guy's lined up to take a penalty for Orient

8. Do not let the game go to penalties
A word of advice: if the scores are still locked after extra-time you might as well cut your losses, leave early and beat the traffic rather than watch Orient lose a penalty shoot-out. The Os have already missed six out of 11 this season and in the vain hope of finding a reliable spot-kicker have rotated the duties between Mooney, Lisbie, Omozusi, James, Ada the groundsman and an 11-year-old boy who looked to have promise when he put one past Theo the Mascot in a sponsored shoot-out at half-time.
Matt Simpson

9. Keep it in the family
While Rotherham's "comical" duo the Chuckle Brothers might have got a giggle back in the 1990s with their famous "to me, to you" gag, Orient supporters the Lloyd-Webbers have brought the house down with their musical talent. While Julian chills out on the cello, Andrew has raked in the cash with Evita, Aspects of Love and Starlight Express - as well as Stephen Ward the musical, inspired by the Wolves and Ireland left-back. Nobody does a showstopper like Lloyd-Webber and his experience will be valuable to the Os on the biggest stage of them all - Wembley.
James Masters 

Robbie Simpson: secret weapon

10. Rely on our secret weapon
Every final needs a hero, and could it be that on Sunday that hero comes from the most unlikely place? Has Russell Slade been keeping Robbie Simpson well away from the pitch in the latter half of the season purely to preserve his strength and fitness for the ultimate play-off cameo? The answer is definitely no, but if Orient are losing with minutes to go, maybe - just maybe - the manager will throw one last roll of the dice and bring on Simpson. And then fate awaits...
Matt Simpson 

GUEST POST! Rotherham 2 Leyton Orient 1, 1/2/14

Until yesterday Orient's league record during my stay in Berlin was played four, won four. A coincidence? Yes. But never mind, for once again Andy Brown - Orient blogger for WAGU and The Two Unfortunates - has stepped in to give his take on events...

A game in which... Orient played with all the conviction of mice up against a Panzer division…while stuck in a wind tunnel. And a game in which the back story wrote itself as ex-O Alex Revell popped up to score the winner for the hosts deep into injury time after Orient forgot that the final minutes are meant to be spent standing in a corner of the opposition half while defenders kick you repeatedly in the back of the legs. 

Orient had started on the backfoot as Rotherham mixed up a combination of howitzer long balls and nice inter-play that completely overran the Orient midfield. Despite being kicked up in the air on a regular basis, the Os showed resilience to stay in the game and scored a cracker when Dagnall’s cross was taken down by Odubajo who angled a shot into the top corner. Nevertheless, a bizarre inability to hold onto the ball in the 94th minute resulted in Revell's winner. 

Still, it was only Orient’s second defeat on the road and it is nice to see Brentford will need to go to Rotherham on a Tuesday night in March! Meanwhile Orient have a game in hand to rectify things...

Moment of magic... Not too many to choose from today, but Moses Odubajo’s composure and sublime finish typified his class. But it was a rare moment of quality in tough conditions. 

Ben Alnwick straps on his boots

Moment of madness... Toblerone-footed deadline day signing Ben Alnwick slicing a kick some way short of the halfway line deep into injury time. Following that, Dean Cox was outmuscled and Alex Revell proceeded to slam in as Vincelot and others decided to watch rather than tackle, robbing Orient of what would have been a hard-fought point. 

Top gun... A tough call, as nobody looked especially convincing for Orient today. Pringle and Thomas were the best players on the pitch, while Orient’s stand out player was probably Odubajo, who continued to battle - and scored a cracking goal - despite being kicked up in the air repeatedly.

Little donkey... With a thousand forwards to choose from - including young, hungry loan signings - it is somewhat baffling that Russell Slade continues with his Robbie Simpson love-in. It took 56 minutes of doing nothing for Slade to figure out that Mooney was blatantly a better option.  

In the dug out... Russell Slade realised that Lloyd James was being outmuscled and replaced him with new permanent signing Marvin Bartley, which helped Orient get a foothold back in the game. Why he persisted with Simpson for 56 minutes is anyone’s guess, but otherwise there was little more the gaffer could have done to ensure a more positive outcome. Afterwards Russell bemoaned Orient’s utter nativity in injury time. “If you want promotions and to be successful, you’ve got to manage the game at all times”, he rightly observed.

View from the opposition... Pantomime baddie Steve Evans was bizarrely all sweetness and light in the programme notes and continued this after the game. “I think it was a good performance from two good teams… the match was really end-to-end and it took something special to win it." Maybe he’s been on an anger management course? 

Facebook post of the week... Os fan Lee Swallow offered some valuable advice on how to kick a football for new keeper Ben Alnwick. Maybe he can brush-up before Orient's massive game against Peterborough next Saturday? 

GUEST POST! Crewe Alexandra 1 Leyton Orient 2, 18/1/14

I wouldn't have been at this match even if I was in the country, as I am banned from the tiny medieval village of Crewe due to an ancient family feud. Luckily Andy Brown - Orient blogger for WAGU and The Two Unfortunates - took one for the team and gives us his take on events...

Robbie Simpson

A game in which... New boy Chris Dagnall made the most stunning debut since a certain Wayne Montague Purser scored a hat-trick in 2003. After a frustrating 45 minutes of having to watch Robbie Simpson lumber about the field like a stoned elephant, Dags decided he was going to show everyone how it should be done, with two clinical strikes within seven blinding minutes that made us wonder if Carl Griffiths was back in town…

Despite not really getting going until the second half, and conceding a suspiciously offside looking goal, Orient matched Crewe for effort in a midfield scrap and it was again Moses Odubajo and Dean Cox who provided the spark. Cox's lofted a ball over the top which Dagnall controlled with one touch, beating programme poster boy Mark Ellis, before lashing across Ben Garratt.

Moment(s) of magic... Dagnall’s brace. His first taken with one touch and second a clinical thumping shot into the bottom corner. The new striker will be making Orient’s thousand other forwards look over their shoulders and while it’s very early to make predictions, his interplay with Cox, James, Lisbie and Odubajo made him look as though he’d been at the club for years. (Jonah alert!)

Moment of madness... Russell Slade’s unwavering faith in Robbie Simpson (in this case ahead of the four other strikers in the bench), which lead to discussions among the Os fans that he must be seeing something really amazing in training that we’re not - or he’s Russ’s lovechild. And that's not to say he doesn’t work hard, but it’s nice if a striker can set up and score goals…

Top gun... Dags was the clear winner, but Odubajo and Cox were also candidates. Captain Clarke had another solid game, denying Aneke with a great stop near the end to prevent a 2-2 draw. This Orient team is very hard to beat and is grinding out wins in tough places, even when not playing brilliantly.

Little donkey... Crewe centre-back Mark Ellis had a comfortable first half with Robbie Simpson, but was run ragged by the guile and clever play of Chris Dagnall throughout the second.

Russell Slade picks his team

In the dugout... Despite starting Simpson ahead of arguably better options on the bench, Russell Slade continues to show the Midas touch and make changes at the right times to win games. Bringing on Vincelot for Ness made Orient’s midfield more combative and solid, and introducing Dagnall won the game. Had he perhaps brought on Loza or Coulthirst, then Orient may have potentially had more goals, but a win is a win!

View from the opposition... Crewe boss Steve Davis was pretty graceless afterwards claiming that defensive mistakes cost his team in the defeat. He did, however, admit that Orient have real quality up front. Thanks Steve - that’s why we’ve scored more than anyone else, so can’t argue with that. Crewe fan Adam Gray was also very gracious, commenting “Congrats on the win, can see why you’ll probably go up.”

Graham Westley: Yeah, well, you too would  be
upset if you were dressed like that

Tweet of the week... Commenting on his debut for Orient, Chris Dagnall displayed typical flamboyancy: “Well that was an alright debut, massive performance from the lads #topoftheleague”. Next week Dags describes getting a hat-trick as “quite fun”. Meanwhile, Graham Westley is back making friends, allegedly telling his Stevenage player to “snap him” (according to Notts County fan Andrew), before Jack Grealish of Notts County was annihilated by this challenge. Way to go Graham. If you can’t beat them, end their careers, eh?

Leyton Orient 0 Preston North End 1,16/11/13

A game in which... Preston took to the pitch pumped and primed for a vicious battle. Orient, on the other
hand, look pumped and primed for a pleasant Sunday afternoon stroll around a bird sanctuary. Yes, for the first 70 minutes of the game the Lilywhites fought harder, pressed harder and scored a beauty of a goal.

The Os did work up a bit of a head of steam towards the end of the match - once Shaun Batt was on the pitch, basically - but to no avail. But, hey, let's not get too upset. It's a massive testament to the way Orient are playing this season that very decent sides such as Preston need to be at the top of their game to take points from us. We're in the automatic promotion positions. Don't panic - enjoy.

Moment of magic... Scott Cuthbert's death-defying, flying tackle on Joe Garner in the second half. The Preston striker was clean through until the Orient defender (who had a great game) hurtled towards him like a pissed up Glaswegian trying to jump the queue at the chippy to ensure he gets the last deep fried Mars bar.

Moment of madness... The second-half moment when David Mooney fortuitously found the ball at his feet six yards in front of goal with no Preston defender anywhere near him. One can only guess what went through the striker's head. My guess is: "Feck! I've got the ball. Although I've just remembered I haven't picked up my dry cleaning yet. Perhaps I could do it tomorrow before I go to the golf course... Oh, I've been tackled. Feck."

Top gun... It's no coincidence that the only time Orient really built up any pressure was once Shaun Batt came on. The big man is a clanking, clattering whirl of trouble to opposition defences and things always happen when he's on the pitch. Time to start him at right midfield, with Moses behind him and Omozusi at left back?

Little donkey... It's obviously totally unfair to judge a new signing on the basis of one single kick of a football, but since in Robbie Simpson's case that kick was straight at the keeper when put clean through on goal in the fourth minute of injury time, I'm going to do exactly that. It was a chance that Homer Simpson could probably have scored, let alone Bart, Marge, Lisa and Maggie. O.J. would probably have murdered the chance too.

In the dug out... If you'll recall, Russell Slade said this after Tuesday's game against Stevenage: "We are only going to be successful if we taste failure." Well, ok, I think we've done enough tasting now though. In fact, in the context of this season the last two results have been a massive Kevin Dearden-sized binge on failure. But fear not: Orient have already proved this season that they can bounce back from adversity. They'll just need to do it again against Swindon.

View from the opposition... Respect to the Preston fans, who were in fine voice throughout. Not all of them were happy though: "£9.60 for two pints, the price to pay to #pnefc winning in the capital," wrote supporter Jon Allison.

Tweet of the week... Respect to Jamie Jones for tweeting the following during last night's Children In Need:
"Just donated £100 but I'll give £1 for every retweet this gets between now and 10 o'clock." Perhaps Jamie underestimated the power of Twitter, however, because over 8,000 retweets later it was looking like his League One goalkeeper's pay packet was going to take a bit of hammering. He hastily tweeted: "Limit reached at £1000 thanks for the awareness raised for the cause and keep donating." And fair play to him too. Though team mate Scott Cuthbert couldn't resist a crack, tweeting: "I will give @jamie1jones £1 for every retweet this gets, poor guys skint" and seconds later following up with: "Sorry my £1 limit has been reached, thanks for the retweets."