Leyton Orient 0 Wycombe Wanderers 2, 1/4/17

A game in which... opposition fans sung "Stand up for the Orient"; a group of home supporters broke into the gantry to unfurl a banner proclaiming "Bollocks"; and local mechanic Errol McKellar fulfilled assistant manager duties in the dugout for the second half. So far so surreal.

What next: Rowan Liburd applauded off the pitch after a man-of-the-match performance? Yes, actually, because this is the end of days at Brisbane Road thanks to that potent combination of incompetency, egomania, spite and Valpolicella that swims around in the brain of our esteemed president.

It was an emotional day: the tragic death of fan Frankie Bish – "Mr Orient" – on Thursday turning the dark clouds already hanging over the club to pitch black. As always of late, the players gave it everything – despite not being paid this month – and even started the game pretty brightly.

The early sending off meant Orient's prospect of defeat moved from "cast-iron certainty" to "inevitable" – not that it really matters when the very existence of the club is at stake.

But what was evident today from the defiant chants and the heartfelt stadium-wide ovation in memory of Frankie was that the soul of Leyton Orient is strong – and that's the one thing the anti-Midas touch of Francesco Becchetti can't destroy.

Jump off your seat moment... The moment some wag in the backroom staff put Jens Janse's name on the team sheet as an April Fool's prank, only for it to catastrophically backfire after no one remembered to take him off it again and the missing Dutchman actually turned up on the pitch.

Taxi for... Charles Breakspear for red-carding Tom Parkes for a borderline foul on Wycombe's Garry Thompson. Given Orient's perilous state it was a decision that suggests the referee's hobbies outside of the game might include the illegal hunting of near-extinct species and kicking cripples.

In the dug out... A while back I joked that the next manager of Leyton Orient would be Ada the kit man. We aren't that far off that becoming a reality since Becchetti's relentless snipering of his own gaffers has taken us down to the bare bones of the club's coaching staff.

Omer Riza – dressed like a self-conscious dinner guest who'd mistakenly believed the dress code to be smart casual rather than black-tie – was the latest to drink from the poison chalice of Leyton Orient management.

He no doubt created some sort of future Trivial Pursuit question by getting himself sent off 45 minutes into his debut, leaving it to youth coach Frederico Morais (with the help of the aforementioned Errol McKellar) to attempt the footballing equivalent of trying to extinguish a volcano with a water pistol in the second half.

And credit to these loyal professionals and the many others still trying to keep our club afloat – and support their own families – despite not being actually paid this month by the billionaire Francesco Becchetti. This latest act by the president is a true measure of the man.

Leyton Orient 0 Crewe Alexandra 2, 29/10/16

A game in which... it became apparent that there must be something more than Francesco Becchetti's rank incompetence, belligerence, arrogance, megalomania and psychopathy that's driven Orient from the brink of the Championship to the brink of the Conference. I think on top of that he must also have a personal vendetta against Os supporters and is deliberately taking us down just to spite each and every one of us.

Far-fetched? Maybe, but not as goggle-eyed mental as the idea that it's somehow the fans' fault for not getting behind the team enough. Anyways, anyways, the game... Well, Orient actually looked vaguely League Two competent – if 100 per cent unthreatening – for the first 25 minutes or so before the ever-predictable defensive cock-ups and consequent two-goal deficit led to drop in footballing ability of such magnitude that I was slightly concerned it might cause the universe to collapse in on itself.

Jump off your seat moment... The substitution of Nigel Atangana, a decision that will go down in human history as the worst since the captain of the Titanic said to his first mate, "Yeah, I hardly think we need to worry about some little iceberg – full speed ahead!" In the swirling ineptitude that engulfs Brisbane Road every fortnight the French midfielder at least seems to have some basic grasp of the minimum requirements of a professional footballer.

Give that man a medal... Ada the kit man, on the basis that as far as I know no Orient player has yet taken to the pitch in odd socks or the wrong-coloured shorts or naked under the Becchetti regime – pretty much the only thing on or off the pitch that hasn't gone cataclysmically wrong. Hats off to Ada for sticking it out – I suspect that [METAPHOR ALERT!] in the event of a nuclear winter he and the cockroaches would be the lone survivors on our scorched planet.

Taxi for... Jens Janse. Who even is this guy? *Looks up Wikipedia* Ah right, well, it was always going to take something special to actually stand out as worse than the rest of the Orient team today, but by God the Dutch right back gave it his best shot by literally passing to a Crewe player every time he got the ball. Thing is though, even he seems to have some sort of pedigree, as does pretty much every other player in the team – including a number of promotion winners. So why are they playing with such lack of confidence, spirit and ability? Could they all coincidentally have lost their talents at exactly the same time? Or could perhaps the deep malaise at the heart of the club be affecting on-field performances? Just a thought.

In the dug out... When you're 2-0 down at home at half-time, taking off a striker and reverting to 4-5-1 is certainly a novel approach. And I'm using the word "novel" here in the sense of Katie Price's 2015 tome Make My Wish Come True, in which a young showbiz reporter goes undercover to expose a cheating TV chef, but risks losing her best friend in doing so. With a record of four losses in five games Alberto Cavasin is clearly going to get the chop soon enough so I can hardly be bothered to expend the energy slagging him off. Also, I could not hope to get close to the comic heights he hits in his own post-match interview. (Choice quote from an incredulous Dave Victor: "So you thought about taking off the substitute??!) Probably a nice enough bloke – hasn't offered any fans out yet so he's one up on Ian Hendon in my book. Not a hope in hell of turning this round, mind. Next.

Meanwhile on Twitter... "Great training today, we are ready for tomorrow's match against Crewe Alexandra" declared the Mr Alberto Cavasin almost as if someone was writing his tweets for him in English and almost as if Orient were actually ready for the match against Crewe, rather than being physically and emotionally exhausted by the double training sessions Francesco Becchetti had insisted upon all week, almost as if he were a qualified sports scientist. It's almost as if no one knows what the fuck they're doing, hey? Almost...